Friday, May 11, 2012

Ok, so I woke up WAY Early this morning and couldn’t go back to sleep! Irritating but oh well. Sometimes it just happens ya know. Well, I was like well, I could put on a Netflix movie or listen to Pandora OR I could go to Youtube and watch some videos. I decided I would listen to some preaching videos, of all things! LOL. I don’t do that very often…don’t know why, just don’t.

Anyway, I br...ought up an old video of TD Jakes preaching at a women’s conference. He was preaching about Abraham and Sarah and how Sarah perceived herself or saw herself. Hmmmm…..needed to hear that. Then I thought let’s see what Lee Stoneking has to say…pulled him up at some conference a long time ago and HE mentioned Abraham and Sarah but then went on to another subject. Finally, I thought about Jeff Arnold and brought up one of him preaching somewhere in Tennessee. Anyway, HE mentioned Abraham and Sarah and how we think about ourselves and how that can affect the outcome of what we are wanting God to do in our lives. Coincidence that all these different preachers spoke about almost the same thing? Probably not. All messages I needed to hear.

Needless to say, I finally drifted off to sleep with Bro. Arnold preaching and woke up later to get ready for my Friday. Now, what was God trying to tell me? LOL! Uh, Kim, why you always worrying about stuff? Why don’t you trust me? Duh! I brought you out, without a doubt, I saved your soul, I made you whole! So STOP worrying about the future. Put it in MY hands cause I already know what’s gonna happen and I GOT YOUR BACK!

For I know what I have planned for you says the Lord.I have plans to prosper you not to harm you. I have plans to give you a future filled with hope.Jer 29:11

Just some random thoughts I had this morning on the way to work. Just wanted to share. Happy Friday everybody!

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Serious Status: I was thinking this morning of how blessed I am. Not sure I’m going to convey what I'm thinking correctly right now but here goes...I was in a bad place financially until 6 months ago when I FINALLY got a full time job...ok, everyone knows that by now...blah, blah, blah...well, if you've never been where I was you cannot relate.
Let me describe how I felt the first weeks of having full time employment after a year or so of looking. Total overwhelming gratitude that I could finally get a 40 hour paycheck, I can finally buy whatever I need and not worry, etc., I felt this way for several weeks after my first paycheck. Typing this out right now is getting me emotional about it again. I'm not sure I have ever said all of this. An overwhelming feeling of gratefulness filled my spirit. I could almost cry every day. I cannot fully explain my emotions but if you’ve been where I was you know what I’m talking about.
Several times I have tried to put into words the way I feel about all this that has transpired in my life the last 2 years but I’m still finding it hard to write it.
I was told a LOT during this time that God will come through, that maybe He wants you to do something else with your life. So I gathered that to mean maybe He doesn’t want me working in corporate America again? Uh, well, I never quite figured that out because hello…I’m back in Corporate America again. Lol. And glad to be here, let me tell ya!
So, during this phase I started looking at working from home jobs, maybe opening a photography business, etc., I thought about all kinds of things but none of them ever firmly “set” in my mind. See, I was raised that you WORK for a living and don’t chase after silly dreams that will never come to pass. It takes a special kind of person to start their own business and see it through to making a living for one, know what I mean? The future looked bleak, indeed….then…you can ask my mom and the rest of my family how stressed I was. They don’t even know the half…what was going on in the inside of me was a horrific battle….wringing of the hands, what am I going to do? Will I ever work again? Where will I be when unemployment runs out? I’m of no use to anyone, not even myself. AND, then another thought…I’m still unmarried; no man wants a woman that doesn’t have a job! I felt like a total failure!
And, to top it off, several people I knew were getting good jobs. I wondered, “Where is MY blessing?” Lord, what is going on? What have I done? Why is this happening to me? I went on like this for several months. I’m sure my Facebook statuses were nothing but negative, negative, negative. I was in a dark place.
Well, to put it bluntly, God has a way of bringing us to Him. This brought me to my knees. I had nowhere else to go. No one could help me. I was in a dark place. I confess, I truly started walking with God during this time. Yes, I was raised on a Pentecostal pew but everything had always come easy to me. I always had a job, always had money, always able to do what I wanted to do when I wanted to do it. Therefore, I never really developed an actual relationship with Christ. It wasn’t until this phase of my life that I went to my knees because well, where ya gonna go, right? I realized that I couldn’t do it on my own. I am not an island.
SO, one early morning in prayer I FINALLY let it go and gave it all to Him! I had come to the end of my rope. What happened next is something I will never forget. I believe I actually got drunk in the spirit and could not speak English. This had never happened to me before, not even during a church service. After that morning, peace filled my heart and I just relaxed and knew that God would work it out somehow. A few weeks later, I got a full time job! He answered when I finally let it go and LET Him work it out!
Now, looking back I realize He was building my faith and even now He is continuing to build my faith. I came through that HUGE trial feeling closer to Him than ever in my life.
Today, I just wanted to try and convey my thoughts on what happened during my unemployment, etc, how I felt, how I cried, how I prayed and mostly how I felt frustrated most of the time. THEN GOD…..
I feel like I won a victory. It was during this time that I really learned that God is my Jehovah Jireh. He provided the open door through a very dear friend from church and she helped me get on where I am today. Thank you, Jeannette Thurik! So it was on with my life. The river of blessings was unstopped and they all came rolling in…finally! I breathed a sigh of relief!
Today, I just wanted to try to tell what I felt during that dark time and just let someone know that God IS working it out for your good. You just have to hold on through the storm. That’s my final answer. Just hold on and He will lead you through the storm!
That’s all for now…..Hope I made sense.


Friday, January 27, 2012

The Whole Armour of God

Verse of the Day“For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.” Ephesians 6:12-13 KJV
We're in a battle between good and evil. Flesh and Spirit. How do we fight? Some battles we need to run from while others we need to stand and fight. Here is how we fight. By putting on the armour of God.
So, what is the whole armour of God?
1. The Breastplate of righteousness - What does this mean? I think it means to meditate on His law and His righteousness and hold His truth and holiness close to your heart. Hence, the reason it is a breastplate. The closest to your heart. His truth should be kept close and needs the most protection. It doesn't mean to be SELF righteous like the Pharisees. It just means don't sway from your faith. Stand firm on the belief that He is the King of your life, your protector, your healer, waymaker, Saviour and BEST FRIEND.
2. Feet Shod with the Preparation of the gospel of peace - be prepared to go where He needs you to go and speak His gospel truth in love. Speak peace to people and show His love. We walk by faith knowing that His word is a lamp to our feet and a light to our path.
3. The Shield of Faith - The shield is in front of us to protect us from anything the devil throws our way. He is our shield and deliverer.
4. The Helmet of Salvation and the sword of the Spirit (the word of God) - Get back into the Word. It will lead and guide you in His ways! It will protect your mind from evil thoughts and when those thoughts come at you (because they will..we're all human) it will be a weapon to throw in the enemy's face.
So, what's the point of this blog? To remind myself and anyone who reads this that Jesus is just waiting for us to get up, get in the fight and stir up the Spirit that is within us. Revive us, Lord!
This year is going to be an eventful year and we must be prepared for anything. Preparation, for me, means more and more prayer and getting into the Word. Therein lies the way to salvation and preparation for what is to come in the future. We don't know what is coming in the future but I want to prepare my heart and my mind and my soul for whatever God has for me in my life.
To be continued,

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

The Single Person's Lament

I did not write this but thought it worthy of putting on here. I have had these thoughts SO many times! Basically, just because I'm single, don't go thinking I'm rich or I have this HUGE amount of MORE time than you! Get over yourself!

~The Single Persons' Lament~ "Being single is not who I am- yes it is part
of me, but it is not what defines me entirely- for you to think my whole life
revolves around me being single and therefore I am thinking about and trying to
look for a mate every second of every day is absurd. That would be as absurd as
me believing that every second of every day you are thinking about pizza. Yes
you probably like pizza- I mean, who doesn't?- But do I believe that it consumes
your every thought and controls your every decision? That at every moment your
true motive is only to find a slice of pizza to savor? I do not think this about
you, so please do not think that my every thought and desire is focused on me
finding someone. I may think about finding someone and even joke about being
single, but I am a whole person. I am not sitting around just waiting for the
right person to come around and "complete me". I can be a good friend, a good
worker, a dependable person, and yes even a GROWN-UP, without being married. I
am a valuable contributing member of society. I am someone that can be counted
on and I am a responsible adult. I may be willing to peacefully go and sit at
the childrens table once in awhile beause no one knows where to put me, but it
doesn't make me a child. I may not have children but that does not mean I do not
have other responsibilities or even other people that depend on me. Don't think
that I have way more free time than you or that all of my time or money is spent
on frivolous waste. I have bills, and things that are required of me too. Time
for all of us is a vacuum- if you have any extra, it will soon be filled up with
everyones "worthy causes". I am glad for the things I am able to do for
others-but just like you -I have to make time for it. I am not stuck in a time
warp. Life does go on even for single people. Age and experience happen to
everyone and are not suspended because you are not married. A single person
while having their own struggles as well, goes through many of the same things a
married person does- just without the support of a spouse. So before you stick
me in a box thinking I just wouldn't understand, or that we have nothing in
common, please- consider what I have written." (My apologies to all extreme
pizza lovers)

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Turn the Page

Sunday morning Pastor Duvall preached on the following passage:

Genesis 41:51 - "And Joseph called the name of the firstborn Manasseh: For God, said he, hath made me forget all my toil, and all my father's house. "
41:52 -" And the name of the second called he Ephraim: For God hath caued me to be fruitful in the land of my affliction."

It seems Pastor Duvall always has a good word that I need to hear. Joseph turned the page and began his journey forward. That's what I'm doing this year. I'm turning the page and moving forward.

Last week I felt a little overwhelmed with all the things I will be doing and be involved in this year. It caused me to have a little bit of an anxiety attack. It was a small one, thank God. I know thats what it was because I checked my blood pressure and it was ok. I had ONE Anxiety attack years ago and let me tell you it was bad. You really feel like you're having a heart attack but you're not. Sometimes, your mind and your body can get so overwhelmed that it can fall apart. I felt that last week but by Sunday I was okay again.

Bro. Duvall's sermon was just what I needed to hear. We have to let go of past hurts so we can move on to the future. We have to turn the page in our story and move on to another chapter. How do we do that? Hmmm....that's a good question. I think one way is to get our mind under control, learn how to pray more and get into the Word. Then when and if we start looking back one day we will see that it really is God's will that a certain thing didn't come to pass, etc., (and I'm not talking specifics here...just generalities)..You know the old song, "sometimes I thank God for unanswered prayers"..

This year my focus will be on the future. What's done in the past is done and over with. (not saying that my past is that bad..I mean, I haven't ever done anything crazy in my life but there have been times when I've been hurt just as much as the next person)

So, I guess what I'm trying to say is that the future is bright and exciting! I'm leaving behind the negative attitude...I'm glad for the Manassah's in my life but now I'm moving on to the Ephraim...the fruitful land. (The latter will be greater). Letting go of the past and moving to the future. What a journey so far and what an even more exciting journey is ahead!

Philippians 3:13 & 14 - "Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus."

Ok, so those are my thoughts for today...scary, huh? lol. Not sure if I said what I really wanted to say but wanted to put this out here because the next few weeks are going to be REALLY busy so not sure when I will be able to do another blog. If anybody actually reads this blog post a comment and let me know.

To be continued,

Friday, January 13, 2012

It's A New Season

Well, it's been a LONG LONG time since I have posted a blog. LOTS of changes have taken place. And, in reality, I just remembered I have this blog site...after looking on Pinterest seeing other blog sites people have. Well, it made me want to look this up and see what I had out there. Uh, the last time I posted was in 2010! and boy was it a negative post! Things have changed and I've learned some lessons along the way. Will have to post more later but the best change is...:

I finally got a full time job! Yay! God has been good to me!

So, It's a new's a new day!

Just wanted to enter a new blog for the year 2012. Will have to post more later.

To be continued,


Friday, February 19, 2010

Unemployed again

Well, the temp job I had since September ended on January 29, 2010. So, I'm unemployed again. And to be honest, I am disgusted. I mean, I knew the job would end but I was so hoping for a few more weeks of employment. I'm disgusted with being unemployed and I'm disgusted with Corporate America. I'm just disgusted.....:) Now, who knows how much longer it will be before I get another job. Another 6-8 months? Oh well, guess that's just the way my life is right now.

So, I have to get out o
f this disgusted stage I'm in and figure out what I'm going to do. Hmmmm.....marry a millionaire? Not likely to happen. Awwww......Plan B! and C! and D!, etc., Back to the old drawing board....possibly go back to school...and look for another career. The Human Resources well is going dry, I'm afraid. At least at my current level. No degree, know what I mean.

So, what to do....Business degree? Music degree? Go to a trade school (as in Everest College, Kaplan College or online courses) ? hmm....lot's o
f choices. We'll see what the next few weeks hold. Unemployment here I come again....ugh!

To be continued.....